Sex at Dawn - Christopher Ryan

"Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes
naturally to our species. Mainstream science--as well as religious and cultural institutions--has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing. Fewer and fewer couples are getting married, and divorce rates keep climbing as adultery and flagging libido drag down even seemingly solid marriages.

How can reality be reconciled with the accepted narrative? It can't be, according to renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. While debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, they offer a bold alternative explanation in this provocative and brilliant book.

With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jethá show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. They explore why long-term fidelity can be so difficult for so many; why sexual passion tends to fade even as love deepens; why many middle-aged men risk everything for transient affairs with younger women; why homosexuality persists in the face of standard evolutionary logic; and what the human body reveals about the prehistoric origins of modern sexuality."

I loved this book, but to be honest I have nowhere near the education to be able to evaluate the validity of the arguments presented in this book. I have seen grumblings here and there around the book about the validity of some of the arguments that are put forward, and I will certainly doing more reading on this fascinating subject. 

Despite being academic and approaching a variety of very weighty subjects the tone of the book is conversational, even jocular. I found the tone endearing. It reminded me of that brilliant, but cool professor whose lectures are both fun and educational at the same time. 

The author's do not advocate any change in lifestyle for anyone, which I appreciated, only to be open minded about what they believe to be the biological drives which people have. There are too many fascinating arguments about too many related subjects to do the book justice in this space however it is sufficient to say that the arguments blew my mind, hugely increased my knowledge, left me with a lot to contemplate and an interest to find out more on this subject.

There were, however, a few points that irritated me. A few examples: they conflate testosterone with happiness, they mainly write about the needs of men and forgo discussing women and their complexity, and they ignore the multifaceted cultural,  societal and emotional factors that relate to mating. I would also write more about their heteronormative perspectives, with homosexuality only coming up a handful of times in one-liners.

Overall an enlightening book that I would recommend however I will certainly being doing more of my own further reading. 

Age Rating 16+. A scientific look at human sexuality. However there is adult content and a few wink wink moments.